Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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