i think my tv is drunk
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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