just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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