so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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