She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
