Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
