Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
