I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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