So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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