If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
