her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
