Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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