Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
accomplished twins. life is a go
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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