I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Randomize
