IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
