And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
