I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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