I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
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