So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Randomize
