You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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