What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
