This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
