I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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