So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize