remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
