When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
