well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Let's paint friendship bongs
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
