Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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