Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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