i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
