I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Randomize
