haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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