at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
