does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
