i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
