Are we in a gay sports bar?
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize