Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
