he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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