you have to choose: penises or morals?
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
