Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
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That was before I lit my hair on fire
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