Heybabeimwearingurpanties
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
