Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
