ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
He shit in the fireplace
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
Randomize