A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
