I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Randomize
