Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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