3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Randomize
