He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize
