absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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