As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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